First blog of the year: Happy New Year!!! I'm hoping the New Year has been kind to all of you!!! I must say, my 2012 has started out with a bang... I was asleep on my couch by eleven o'clock on New Year's Eve... partied with the back of my eyelids and it was great!!! In a weeks' time, however, there have been the ups and downs in my life... so much can happen in such a short amount of time. Misunderstandings, misinterpretations of actions, and miscommunication by all parties have had the stress levels rising and me questioning some of the "blessings" I listed on my 2011 Blessings list... mostly the blessing that my job has been recently... that was mostly what was being questioned. Feedback on something somebody "perceived" as wrong is pretty difficult to swallow and it really honestly sucks. But as I sit back and reflect (and kind of let it fester... not gonna lie), I began to think and wonder... "God how are you going to use this? What are you doing in this whole situation?" Questions... questions I did not want to ask and really did not want to know the answers too... difficult situations and confrontation are not really something I enjoy, I must admit that.
The reality of it all hit me this morning in my morning devotional. God uses all things, instances, feedback, and happenings... He uses it all for our good... for my growth and my focus, even if it hurts or is crazy difficult to process. Romans 8:28 hit me like a ton of bricks... just like the meetings Thursday that caused the anxiety and stress to fly... only the Scripture hit me in a great way and did not cause my eyes to swell. My word for the year 2012 is commitment, as I mentioned in "Yesterdays and Tomorrows". Deep in my heart I am questioning my commitment to the "things" in my life... in this life. It hurts me most to realized that maybe I have lost focus on a few things... that sometimes commitment hurts and that I may not have been as committed as I thought I was. A harsh realization, but good one to build on.
I then realize that I am blessed by counsel, not just from God, but counsel from those who love me and love God more. Growing is hard... listening and acting on counsel can be harder... but it is a step in the right direction... even though I'm pretty block headed and I do not always allow the truth to sink in until about twenty-four hours later. I also realize that people will question my actions, attitude, and life... questions will come. And sometimes the questions will hurt, but when I sit and think and seek the counsel God gives, I realize the truth behind Romans 8:28, that He truly does know what He is doing, not just in the good but also in times that come off to me as bad. "ALL things work together for good..." and the ALL is what is brought to my attention. The ALL is the good and the bad, the fun and the difficult... but ALL... works together for one purpose. That purpose? The purpose of ALL things is to glorify God... glorify my Creator... praise Him and focus on that commitment through ALL times, the good and the bad... something I struggle with mightily but that I have guidance and counsel to point me back to Him in all things.
Slowly my anxiety and frustration have lowered, although the happenings of this week may have left a sour taste in my mouth and me questioning how much I trust some people. Reassurance came in the form of text messages from a few people who care enough to offer counsel when I seek it in times of need... prove it to them... for His glory. It is truthfully ALL in the hands of God, not of man or in the words of another. He is the one who supplies for my needs... the one who is meant to be glorified... the day is His... all is His... I am His. Refocus on commitment... commitment to Him. Let the questions and difficulties come... they come to glorify Him. Commitment. Focus. All things, work together, for good... He makes them ALL work together.
BTW, I have already kept one resolution for the year: attend at least one yoga class... talk about muscles that are sore... I am definitely that today!!! AND, Candice and I now have a new Saturday workout: Yoga... for an hour... crazy.
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"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them."
~*Romans 8:28*~
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