Psalm 62:1-2

Silence:  a lesson being learned.  Quiet.  Still. Tranquil.  Peaceful.  Lately none of these words have described my heart.  It has been restless and anxious, crying out to God, worrying that maybe He was not hearing me or that I was not "praying or asking the "right way"".  But He does hear.  God does hear the cry of hearts who love Him and long for Him.  Even though He may be silent for a time, He never leaves me alone and is always there to comfort me.  My heart was screaming for a sign, my mind was racing without brakes, worrying that He just was not hearing me.  In all honesty, I was just being impatient.  I was not quiet.  My mind was not still.  My heart was not at rest in Him.  All of this because I was not patient and I did not feel like waiting for Him.  But He was waiting for me.  Boundaries stretched but not broken.  God delivered as He always does, a sign that He does hear and is near to a restless heart.  And the raging storm was calmed by His mighty, protective hand.  He knows what I can handle, even if I often doubt it.  He knows that patience will grow as faith in Him grows.  Silence, my lesson being learned:  the stillness and peace of God.  What a comfort.  What a blessing.
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¹ I wait quietly before God,
      for my victory comes from him.
 ² He alone is my rock and my salvation,
      my fortress where I will never be shaken.

~*Psalm 62:1-2 (NLT)*~

Craziness Known as Life

What a weekend it has been.  What a stretch the past month has been.  What a battle life has been.  In the mix of good and bad there is God.  In the mix of my life there has been the bad.  In the mix of my struggles there has been the good.  In the mix has been my God.  He has this tendency to humble us by whatever means He needs.  I am broken before Him, crushed, exhausted, and beaten.  God – the only One who can put together the shattered.  Put together the way God wants me to be put together, not how I imagined me or necessarily want to be put together.  Because God is the artist and I am the work of His hands, His work of art, He puts me together the way the Creator works a masterpiece.  Shattered… it is the place most have to be taken to in order to see the glory of God in life.  To some, that sounds silly, I know it did to me at first but now I see it.  Because I am powerless to defend my life and fight for myself, the only place God can get me to realize I need Him is a place of breaking me down.  That is how I could describe life lately.  Hectic, anxious, weary, and finally to the point of broken is life.  It is amazing how quickly God pieces life back together.  It is amazing how quickly He can turn a heart to look to Him.  I have seen the glimpses here and there.  I have caught a blessing and KNEW that was what it was, a blessing.  But I did not lean into His presence and His glory.  It is hard but nobody said it would be easy.  Hit like a ton of bricks it can be a crushing blow known as being humbled by God.  If I don’t humble me, God will.  He did it and it is astounding!!!  Jeremiah 17:5-10 because I have not trusted in God and it is so easy to run to somebody over God because they are visibly standing right in front of me.  I have trusted too much in “mere humans” and not enough in God.  2 Chronicles 14:11 because I am powerless to defend myself against anything in life and only God can battle for me.  I have relied on a power of my own over the power that created eternity and gave breath to life.  Deuteronomy 13:4 because I have served more than God and have not been on my knees in obedience to Him when He has called.  I have not clung to Him as God but developed the “plus God” disease… my job plus God, my finances plus God, my life plus God… and nothing should be in addition to God.  It should be God alone.  And the final blow… the knock out and comfort that everything happens for a reason, God-incidence not coincidence Romans 8:28 because everything works together and happens for a purpose.  Because I couldn’t see that everything works together and my peanut brain couldn’t believe it or trust in it.  My heart strayed, turned away, and sulked until I couldn’t take it… but a shoulder to cry on was God.  He answered.  He comforted.  He gave clarity and blessing and peace and hope.  And I know.  I know that I am not alone because it is spelled out all over the Bible that God is with me wherever I am.  Joshua 1:9 because I needed to remember God is with me.  A text message taken as a sign for a listening ear… impeccable timing but God’s plan nonetheless.  Wisdom and love given by God.  Life only given by God.  That is the craziness known as my life at this point.  A craziness blanketed in love by my God who never leaves me alone and gives me support and ears to cry to but not abuse or run to over Him.  A humbling experience when I need it most blanketed by His peace and comfort because He is God and only He can fight my battle for me… I can’t even fight for myself.  Only God because He is God.  That is enough for me.

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" ⁵ This is what the Lord says:
   “Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans,
      who rely on human strength
      and turn their hearts away from the Lord.
 ⁶ They are like stunted shrubs in the desert,
      with no hope for the future.
   They will live in the barren wilderness,
      in an uninhabited salty land.

 ⁷ “But blessed are those who trust in the Lord
      and have made the Lord their hope and confidence.
 ⁸ They are like trees planted along a riverbank,
      with roots that reach deep into the water.
   Such trees are not bothered by the heat
      or worried by long months of drought.
   Their leaves stay green,
      and they never stop producing fruit.

 ⁹ “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things,
      and desperately wicked.
      Who really knows how bad it is?
 ¹⁰ But I, the Lord, search all hearts
      and examine secret motives.
   I give all people their due rewards,
      according to what their actions deserve.”"

~*Jeremiah 17:5-10*~

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"...O Lord, no one but you can help the powerless against the mighty! Help us, O Lord our God, for we trust in you alone..."

~*2 Chronicles 14:11*~

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"Serve only the Lord your God and fear him alone. Obey his commands, listen to his voice, and cling to him."

~*Deuteronomy 13:4*~

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"This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."

~*Joshua 1:9*~

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"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them."

~*Romans 8:28*~

Isaiah 26:1-6

Have you ever seen a shooting star?  Did you sit back and marvel at it... the creativity of God?  This has been somewhat of a rough week yet a lot of learning is being done.  I have been restless, anxious, and worn out... all from wrestling and battling and worrying.  I ask God for signs, a kind word here or there, or to show me something in His glory.  I have gotten a few but this morning was AMAZING!!!  As I stepped out of my apartment to go to work, I just happened to look up.  And there I saw it.  I saw God's sign directly in front of me, exactly where I looked.  The most wonderful shooting star streaked a short line through my sight and although it didn't last more than a half of a second, it was all I needed.  God used His creativity, majesty, and excellence and in just half a second He had all of my attention.  I found myself looking up my entire way to work, searching the skies for more of the same beauty and wonder I had just witnessed a short time before.  Then it hit me and God was definitely speaking to my heart.  The way I was searching the skies for yet another shooting star, that is how I should be seeking after Him.  The way I was looking up is where I need to look to find Him.  I will admit that this has been a bit difficult lately, but God knows what I need.  He knew a simple sign of beauty would get me to look up and search for more.  God knew how to draw my attention to Him and open the ears of my heart to hear.  He has my attention, eyes, ears, and all.
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"... Our city is strong!
      We are surrounded by the walls of God’s salvation.
 ² Open the gates to all who are righteous;
      allow the faithful to enter.
 ³ You will keep in perfect peace
      all who trust in you,
      all whose thoughts are fixed on you!
 ⁴ Trust in the Lord always,
      for the Lord God is the eternal Rock.
 ⁵ He humbles the proud
      and brings down the arrogant city.
      He brings it down to the dust.
 ⁶ The poor and oppressed trample it underfoot,
      and the needy walk all over it."

~*Isaiah 26:1-6 (NLT)*~

James 4:7-8

It amazes me everyday to see how God works, not just in my life, but in the lives of those around me.  What amazes me more is His presence and peace in my life in the good and the bad times.  I have felt it so much lately and it is indescribable.  Through the words and prayers of friends I have felt a calming peace and know that it is God's blessing and presence.  As I run and read and learn more and more about His faithfulness, I feel Him present here.  In a battle being fought but already won by Christ, I see His glory and majesty and know that when I am near to God, Satan stands no chance.  When I am surrounded by the prayers of those who love Jesus, I am blanketed and shielded by a wall that cannot be knocked down simply because of the power of Christ.  The nearer to God I am, the further away from Satan I am.
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"So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.  Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world."

~*James 4:7-8 (NLT)*~

James 1:12-15

Why is there evil in this world?  Could it be simply because we, mankind, exist?  Just a thought that has been circulating in my head.  God is not evil, nor does he lead us to do evil.  Satan tempts us and we choose to either give it up to God or give in to temptation.  I face it everyday.  Most everybody, I assume, faces temptation every day.  Some choose God.  Others choose the worldly self-satisfaction.  Have you ever wondered what life would be like here on earth if 10% more would choose God over self?  What about even just 5%?  I know evil would still exist in this place and that temptations would still present themselves as obstacles for our hearts and minds.  But how sweet would that be?  God doesn't tempt, but he does provide us a way out and through temptation (1 Corinthians 10:13).

How do you combat temptation and evil?  Recently I have struggled mightily with this question.  Prayer?    How often?  Do I still have God on my side?  FOR SURE!!!!  I have to remember the race that I am running and why I am running it.  My heart has often lost focus on the cross this past month.  I have been set on finishing for me.  I have sought approval and at times attention from others over that of God.  My heart lost focus on what matters the most and who matters the most.  I was not set on the cross.  Only the greatest and best gift, the shiniest and most prestigious award can be given by God.  Only God can crown with the crown of eternal life.
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"God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.  And remember, when you are being tempted, do not say, “God is tempting me.” God is never tempted to do wrong, and he never tempts anyone else.  Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away.  These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death."

~*James 1:12-15 (NLT)*~

Hebrews 12:1-3

Endurance is something to be built gradually over a steady period of time.  It is not something that is instantaneous, that happens overnight or in one workout.  In a previous post I mentioned that I am working my way through the Couch to 5K running plan.  It is a gradual process of building endurance and getting into shape.  I am on week two which means running for longer periods of time.  With endurance and strength building, the first workout of this week (week two) is difficult, but not as difficult as it would have been had I not gone through week one of the training plan.  Day two of week two was already easier than day one of week two. 

Such it is in life I am learning.  My endurance, strength, and mental and spiritual health have taken a decently big hit recently.  At first my question was the usual "why God?" question.  Courtesy of proper "training" it is now the "what are you doing through this God?" and "how are you working in this God?" questions.  So often the "why" is the first question when I struggle.  It is becoming more and more what it should be and that is the "what" and "how" replacing the "why".  Through the restless but not quite sleepless nights and days of "fatigue" it has been difficult to ask and see the "what" God is working in my life.  Endurance... little by little, over a stretched and steady period of time, God is building that endurance in me.  He has provided me with the proper "training equipment" and has blessed me with so many wonderful "coaches" to push me and hold me accountable.  The strength to persevere can only be found in Christ who faced much more than I will ever face.  That is the fuel to keep going.
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"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.  We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.  Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up."


~*Hebrews 12:1-3 (NLT)*~

1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Encouragement that needs encouraging:  my workout plan.  1 Corinthians 6:19-20 are going to be my motivation for my health for the next few months and probably many more to follow... a straight reminder that my body is not my own but that it belongs to God.  As somebody has told me, I am only "renting" or "babysitting" this earthly body for God.  When something precious to another is entrusted to me, I generally do my best to take care of it.  In the past that has not necessarily been the case with my body.  It hit home hard after rereading "God bought you with a high price".  I have read these verses many times but never took verses 19 and 20 to heart the way I should have.  Sure I have been working out and eating healthy, but was that truly for God or mostly for me?  So encouragement that needs a little encouraging and motivation at this point:  I am chugging my way through the "Couch to 5K" workout plan.  I can honestly say that I have NEVER been able to run more than a half of a mile.  Part of that was because I was lazy and part was because I have never taken it to heart that my body was not my own and did not treat it as though I was living for Christ.  I have survived week one of the C25K program, but it got difficult here towards the end.  As silly as it may sound, Satan has also been attacking me, telling me that I can't do it... there is no way I will make it through C25K because I have never been able to do it before... why could I do it now?  I know that I can do it IF my focus is on the One it should be... the Creator.  My body is not mine; it is a temple of the Holy Spirit and I have been chosen to take care of it.
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"Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body."


~*1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (NLT)*~